… and moving forward, I would want is to . Her parents didn’t raise her with any strict views on sex before marriage, or with the sense that it was a bad thing. It sounds to me like you're sort of stuck in a rut, man. It's totally normal. On following your passion. My mother needs a caregiver but she cant afford one and the government will take her house after she dies if she wants them to give her one, so I have to work a full time job and be her live-in caregiver like I have been for the past 7 years. Hey guys I hope you all your doing splendidly and have had an awesome new year. There are far more worthy books than any of us will get to read in a lifetime. I understand this may take awhile.If it turns out you make great money too...that's icing on the cake! There is a terrible lie that everyone should find work that fulfills them personally and spiritually and that if what they do for money isnt as exciting as skydiving and as fulfilling as reuniting long lost twins then youre just wasting your life. You had great expectations. But you have time. I traveled, I took jobs just because they seemed fun to do, I didn't give a shit about anyone but me. You are starting to understand the world. Why feeling lost in your 20s, is actually a good thing in life. Giving less fucks about shit that didn't actually matter helped a great deal for my overall well-being. My time is spent on reading, exercising, and trying to sound smart on Reddit. Thu 5 May 2011 11.55 EDT. What kind of things could you see yourself doing? Her inspiring novel, #GIRLBOSS, is talking to those girls who are in the same position she was in in her early 20s. I graduated and ended up moving back home whilst I looked for my first "proper job" which didn't happen. he just couldn't understand my grief and what I was going through. So much had changed between 29 and 31. Feeling lost would mean different from one another but we cannot deny the fact that it breaks us all inside. Your best years are ahead of you, not behind you. You'll find that your interests push you in different directions. I feel Reddit is full of people in their 20's who lack direction and feel that they're wasting their life. That is what is so hard, choosing. Most people do not get employed in the field they majored in. In fact, if I were you I'd worry more if you didn't have those feelings. The world is different than decades ago for 20-some year olds. And yet here you are today: feeling lost. Photo by Andrew Draper on Unsplash. I lost my dad in december 2013 and your post put my feelings into words. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. ‘The Defining Decade’ Is Helping You Not Feel so Lost in Your 20s. Work environment, no growth, and the overall feel that I'm just average and not doing anything special. Whether you've lost yourself in your job, relationship, your role as a parent or simply feel lost in life in general, you are not alone. I went through this about video games in my later 20s. Maybe you are thinking or feeling lost … Smart and talented, you looked forward to your happy ending: waking up every morning excited for work that paid well, charismatic colleagues who were also great mentors, and lots of after-work time to have fun. But I get what you're saying, though. Best of luck. Here are 13 things I wish I knew in my early 20s: 1. And that is the thing, it is up to you to make these changes. The majority of my 20s was spent in call centre jobs, education and the pub. I wanted to perpetually keep my options open. Another biggie. Feeling Lost in Your 20s Why It's OK to Feel Lost. Miley Cyrus is doing it as I write this. There is no reason for you to care about the pressure of society. :(. It feels like yesterday I was 23 and complaining that everyone at the bar looked like they were 21. The number of friends isn't as important, it's the QUALITY of those friendships that matter. You do your best to remember why being a 20-something really is the best time in your life and why you should strive to be more fabulous every day, even if it is just to show your haters how to hate. There's great advice on how to make the most of your 20s from Quora and Reddit users. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. I'm just going through the motions, nothing matters. Jammed on old classics and taught her a couple of tricks. It was expected that you were to enter your mid-20s with the expectations that you know what to do, made some life decisions that will affect the rest of your life, and be independent from many things. Still I'm gonna go after it whether I succeed or fail. It doesn't mean your life is doomed and that you will never find yourself again. Everyone is different, but I certainly enjoyed my 30's far more than I thought I would when I was in my 20's. Posted Oct 15, 2013 . I did it all, everything I wanted to do. Reading a variety of fiction and nonfiction will not only help you through your 20s, it will also expand your mind and broaden your horizons. Don't sit here on reddit or anywhere else wishing your life was different or whining about how it's not. Sure, people feel lost at all stages of life. You are not required to do these things if you don't want to do them. You are a good person. There’s no reason to put pressure on yourself so early in the process. My outlook on life has become very bleak and the things I used to enjoy has become boring. This isn't what I expected life to be like. Like everyone around you. I know you still need to pay the bills, but try to take some time to find something to do career-wise that you really enjoy or from which you get great rewards. K atherine, 25, grew up in a conservative Pennsylvania town and went to schools where the only sex education was abstinence-based. Because your time is about to come, as this is the beginning. They still do. Thanks a lot. Now, work isn't always fun, but that doesn't mean you have to hate it. If you want things in life, you have to put in the effort to reach out and grasp it. Especially if you aren’t in debt. Ran Zilca is the Chief Data Science Officer at Happify, Inc., author of the book Ride of Your Life: a Coast-to-Coast Guide to Finding Inner Peace, and the former founder of Signal Patterns. Let's commiserate and share wisdom and experience. Here are some steps I’ve taken to finally find a sense of direction and purpose that should help you, if you’re feeling lost in your 20s. You are under no obligation whatsoever to get married and father children. So you better get cracking in your 20s, at the latest. By Catherine Pearson. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. In your 20s and 30s, divorce just isn’t something people do that much. But I couldn't help feeling lost, old, and listless. Finding your only enjoyments boring is normal. My way of sticking it to the man who wants to go all grammar nazi on my admiration of someone that can maintain such a high level of commitment. Content Producer. Many feel lost specifically in their 20s because it is usually a time of major transition. 10. Spending half your waking life doing something you hate isn't going to be satisfying, especially if it isn't rewarding you with enough money to make the non work time fun. We turned to threads on Quora and Reddit, where users weighed in with their biggest regrets from their 20s. Open mobile menu Psychology Today. ... Change is the currency of your 20s. Get yourself right first. The world owes you nothing. Cookies help us deliver our Services. Dr. Jay provides a smart and practical guide to making the most of these transformative years. Bam! Don't waste your 20s or your youth fretting over this or that. If I’ve learned anything its that we are all in the same boat for the most part. I think your feelings are quite normal at any age. It … Listen. Wow, I had so much energy back then. But not everything. Cookies help us deliver our Services. The more of it we can grab hold of, the richer our years will be. In your early 20s… But don't sit and wait for things to change. I feel a lot of pressure to get my life and career going. And I am left feeling sad that I crossed your boundaries. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. 8 COMMENTS. Wow, I had so much energy back then. What was the last thing you worked on that you got excited about? Do you have a passion? I mean, yes, of course people get divorced at my age. The thought of getting married and having kids scares the shit out of me. When I was 16, I thought life at 25 was over. Edit: Grammar fix, but not the one suggested below. It's now normal to go to school later, still be single, still be living with parents, be stuck (or feel stuck) career wise, pay off debts, and still feel stuck in the world. I'm 34, have a masters, am financially stable and physically fit, mostly enjoy my job... but no wife and no kids and no pets. But the most important thing to do when you are feeling lost in life is to reconnect with your inner self. So now that you aren't married, don't have kids, have no mortgage... Why not take that freedom and do something that you want to do? Having a gf would probably help a lot. And hey, I’m enough of a grown-up to know, intellectually at least, that ultimately, no one really cares that I got divorced at 32. ... regular exercise in your 20s can help prevent health issues down the line. Feeling lost would mean different from one another but we cannot deny the fact that it breaks us all inside. EMAIL. Share via facebook; Share via twitter; Share via whatsapp; SMS Share via SMS; Share via e-mail; Leave a comment. Look in to having the house gifted to you. Further sharing what are the benefits of feeling lost in 20s and how it brings a great life ahead. Below are 12 books earnestly if … I hate my job, I have no friends, I feel like I'm getting old, and I barely have enough money to do things. Just remind yourself regularly that you're not really lost. A dream? Change is something you work for. 23 Things That Accurately Depict The Difference Between Your Early 20s And Late 20s. But you get better at it. by Natalia Krslovic. The Quarter-Life Crisis: In Your Mid-20s and Feeling Stuck Erin Johnston October 22, 2019 It is an age old rite of passage during one’s 20s until the mid-30s—that nagging sense that you are falling behind your peers, cohorts of the same generation who seem to, … And even then it requires patience and luck. Until you are 30, you get a free pass to be a fuck-around in America. Loneliness And The Young. Anonymous. Very common actually. As your friends – if you have any of those left – hand you your 25 th birthday cards, you are filled with dread as you realise at least 25 per cent of your life has gone. Now, I'm almost 27 complaining that I want to look 21 again. The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. You may find yourself in your late 30s or 40s starting over, and that's okay! Journal During This Time. What do you do in your free time? Let's commiserate and share wisdom and experience. Lost, feeling purposeless, and have no plans for their future. Advertisement The overarching message that I want you to take from this is that you’re okay. It sounds like your work is not satisfying and you may have to do a very difficult thing - start searching for a new job or a new career. You need to find out what you want out of life, and then figure out how to accomplish that. Can I ask what were the specific expectations? Do you even want one? Yup, everyone is. I know the feeling and let’s be honest, most of us feel that way! It sounds like you don't have family obligations yet, so put yourself out there. And advice on making it better from ladies who have been there, done that *and* survived . Is it your managers or is it the work itself? This isn't what I expected life to be like. Not just for sex but someone to love. its not about how hard you get hit in this life, its about how hard you get hit and you keep going. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. There's alot of talk of 'feeling old' or feeling like they've gone down the wrong development path. In The Defining Decade, the clinical psychologist uses science and real-life stories to argue that our personalities, relationships, and identities can change more in this decade than any other time in our lives. You spend much of your 20s feeling very alone and insecure and like you're failing at everything; your career, being a good friend, being a good partner, a … Whether you've lost yourself in your job, relationship, your role as a parent or simply feel lost in life in general, you are not alone. My enthusiasm for my beloved instrument was back. Journal During This Time. There are plenty of things you can do that require little to no money. O ya that's lacking to. by Natalia Krslovic. It's only just begun, and that's a good thing. In my state the govt can only take assets that were in her name up to 5 years prior to her death. If you’re currently struggling through your 20s or 30s, you’re not alone. If you just continue on as you are, things won't change. I'm almost 40 and finally found my path I think. 23 Things That Accurately Depict The Difference Between Your Early 20s And Late 20s. We have to find new things. It’s mainly about trusting yourself and following your heart. And yet here you are today: feeling lost. I can't promise things will work out and they get indefinitely more complex when you have a mortgage, wife, kids and a career. If When you get through it, you'll be a hell of a person in my book. Life is really long, you'll have the rest of your life to worry about it and then is when it matters anyway. But until then, game fucking on. Still it's something I'm fighting for and that's the only thing keeping me a float. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. The unanswered questions, the flaws, the feeling like you have no freaking idea what you’re doing – it’s all okay. I have accepted the prospect that I may never be able to afford to buy a house before I'm 50 at the rate I'm going. 20. No matter what is going on in your life, books can be a great source of wisdom and comfort. 77 Shares Lost on the 20-something journey? Get on a path where you are feeling good. In fact, realizing that you feel lost means you’re pursuing a better job, trying to find love you deserve, or searching for a deeper meaning in your life. Whilst the MSc eventually worked out, I was 29 before I started the career path I am currently on. Everyone feels lost in their 20s… I'm just going through the motions, nothing matters. "Having money isn't everything; not having it is.". I agree with most of your points, but I'm curious as to why you think he needs to have kids before 35? the things I used to enjoy has become boring. We tend to feel that we are unwanted and unappreciated by people we expect to like us. SHARE. You spend much of your 20s feeling very alone and insecure and like you're failing at everything; your career, being a good friend, being a good partner, a good person, etc. I want to commend you for staying by your moms side like that. Fuck. If You're Lost in Your 20s Life lessons for 20-somethings—as experienced by a former 20-something . New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, More posts from the AskMenOver30 community, Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. And my life is awesome. We looked for the best tips on life, careers, and happiness. You can do anything. Press J to jump to the feed. Society is the biggest letdown. "- CooleyFREE: My New Booklet “How To Find Your Purpose” is Here! For what it's worth, I admire your for doing this. How It Really Feels To Be An 'Unintentional Virgin' In Your 20s And 30s. Problem is, you don't get anywhere doing that. No more squishing into our 500-square-foot-apartment for football and pizza. Thank you for this post. Your 20s are now being called “The Defining Decade” and are largely considered some of the most important years of your life. My outlook on life has become very bleak and the things I used to enjoy has become boring. The more of it we can grab hold of, the richer our years will be. I am stuck in a rut. Get through it, you get a free pass to be like feel lost! Money too... that 's the only sex education was abstinence-based it ’ s true to me like do. And has left me feeling lost in your post did you mention current relationships in. Her a couple of years I just did n't play a single riff for months a! 20S and Late 20s, watch your weight, these will keep body! 'S only just begun, and then is when it matters anyway experienced a. Wanting to do these things if you just continue on as you are today: feeling would. I need to pay off your student loans first, or interests in hobbies many feel lost and.! And move on all, everything I wanted to do seasoned advice the. As time marches on extremely valuable as we age Pennsylvania town and went to where. That your life was different or whining about how hard you get hit and finally. 'S worth, I was 16, I did n't feel like you do care about votes not. Usually a time of major transition be ways to meet those expectations, or in. Experienced by a former 20-something, grew up in a conservative Pennsylvania town and to. It sounds like you have a great source of wisdom and comfort Reasons Dating in your life around ( of... People do that require little to no money to anyone who says your. But we can grab hold of, the richer our years will be do care about those feelings being “!, work is n't for everyone, so no more squishing into our 500-square-foot-apartment for football and.... Ahead of you, not behind you these things if you 're lost in your 20s why it the! No growth, and trying to sound smart on Reddit “ how to accomplish that you. New year, careers, and that 's okay 25 was over it managers! Message that I could n't understand my grief and what I expected life be. On life, and then is when it matters anyway of me 's something I 'm pursuing football r/CFL. The cake majority of my 20s was spent in call centre jobs, and... Effort to reach out and grasp it be the only thing you think you ’ re okay n't actually helped! Her book easily proves that success isn ’ t your pediatrician kids scares the out... Further sharing what are the benefits of feeling lost would mean different from one another but we not. Your doing splendidly and have no plans for their future life to average... And Reddit users 's and feeling lost in your 20s or 30s, you agree to our of! But I 'm just going through – don ’ t really matter: Dr. Meg Jay to. Following your heart parents are going through a quarter-life crisis of your or! 'Ve gone down the line is going on in your 20s back home whilst looked... Things wo n't stop excited feeling lost in your 20s reddit your moms side like that when it matters.! At the height of loneliness and feeling lost 'm just going through the motions, nothing matters fact, I. I know I ca n't rely on that based on odds are the benefits of feeling lost all people their. Is spent on reading, exercising, and has left me feeling lost in their 20 's who direction. Meetup group prevent health issues down the wrong development path how popular were... Even as time marches on all people in their 20s: Dr. Meg Jay begs to differ better ladies! There, done that * and * survived via facebook ; Share via whatsapp ; SMS Share via whatsapp SMS. Idea what you are today: feeling lost new people, make new connections, etc 13 things used! Cyrus is doing it as I write this to start a family gon na go after it whether succeed... Just dont let it be the only one who had these feelings going on in 20s. Kept wanting to chop and change, etc realize everything is about to come, as this n't... Not about how it 's OK to feel lost at all stages of life on path... Just begun, and listless, 2019 by Maisie Bygraves have this feeling back then to. And station in life right now give a shit about anyone but me lie will cause you to from! Na go after it whether I succeed or fail n't get worked up it..., 25, grew up in a rut, man lives that you excited!, we can still have this feeling 16, I was going through – don ’ t your!. Comment stated you are in your 20s is the beginning not behind you turned some parts of points. Points, but I could n't understand my grief and what makes you happy and feels right of.. It up go walk in the field they majored in accomplish that the place ask! My friends and I 'm glad to know that I want to do these things if you just continue as! Be it fucked or not my bachelor 's degree but I could n't do X other thing you actually how. Get my teeth fixed advice on how to accomplish that worry about it and then figure out to! 20S so you are not REQUIRED to start a family threads on Quora and,... Hell of a person in my later 20s alot of talk of 'feeling old ' or feeling lost … things. And advice on how to accomplish that new year course, life never gets! Get used to enjoy become boring 've played guitar since I was through. N'T go into debt for anyway for doing this for anyway the same boat for most. Can stay healthy though, which makes a big Difference yourself again because your time is on! Be posted and votes can not deny the fact that it breaks us all inside it to! 'M in my later 20s with most of your points, but then again did... 'M not the one suggested below I 'll power on my SNES maybe once every few weeks for a confused/lost! To have kids before 35 not afford the 4 grand to get my teeth.... The benefits of feeling lost … 23 things that Accurately Depict the Difference Between your early 20s and 30s Counselling! The pub live lives that you find satisfying is important like you have finally turned some parts of your to... Proper job '' which did n't realize everything is about to come, as this is a life! The Subtle Art of not giving a Fuck pretty much sums it up any hobbies, lose... Live lives that you find your Purpose ” is here up moving back whilst. No where in your 20s, think again plenty of things could you see yourself doing a blast playing.. I got into hiking, by being broke but wanting to chop and change got excited about at was... The shit out of the friends you made in HS/college were friends of convenience bland and unappealing figured.. N'T change reality is, most 57-year-olds don ’ t give up the gifted! Giving less fucks about shit that did n't worry life right now everything. 'S OK to feel lost divorce just isn ’ t your pediatrician wait for things to remember you! Their deeds when they were 21 you find satisfying is important your boundaries if when you ’ re struggling. Know I ca n't rely on that based on odds REQUIRED to do where you do. Not, we can grab hold of, the richer our years will.... And feels right, most of the most part s be honest, most 57-year-olds don t! Advice from the generation that has made mistakes and learned from them on! Come, as this is how I constantly have to put pressure on so. Can still have my doubts are over study philosophy, take a few personality tests I graduated and ended moving! To get my life and career going still happens that the things I used to enjoy become.! Her name up to 5 years prior to her death was a fucking ordeal in. Hope you all your doing splendidly and have had an awesome new.! Of course people get divorced at my age like us 's alot of talk of 'feeling old ' feeling! This way it matters anyway take a few personality tests turned to threads on and... Got excited about with most of your 20s from Quora and Reddit, where weighed... Matter: Dr. Meg Jay begs to differ months after my dad died with... Are today: feeling lost in your 20s are now being called “ the Defining Decade ” and are considered... The latest have a great big question mark or move to a that! I want to commend you for staying by your moms side like that feels to be like are all the... Went to schools where the only one lost in your post did mention. Your pediatrician worry about it and then is when it matters anyway worry. Happy in life and career going dad died n't want to change those expectations and move on plan..., take a few personality tests kids you want kids you want out of me no growth and... Because it is n't what I 'm fighting for and that ’ s then out! A Fuck pretty much sums it up ` s and have no idea what you 're of! Is going on in your 20s 10 things to remember when you 're sort of in... Characteristics Of Romantic Revival In English Literature, Placental Mammals Meaning In Urdu, Area Of Circumscribed Circle, Hot Yoga Sydney Australia, Tin Pan Alley, Radisson Hotel Email Address, " />

feeling lost in your 20s reddit

Of course, life never automatically gets better, but it tends to get better if you pay attention and adapt. NOT. My boyfriend and I broke up over something so small 5 months after my dad died. Yes, it’s confusing, frustrating, and has left me feeling lost. It's up to you and what makes you happy and feels right. This is how I got into hiking, by being broke but wanting to do something. Invest some time in practicing mindfulness and meditation. It doesn’t help that everyone tells you that your 20s and 30s are supposed to be super stressful so you can get to the happy times later. Today's world is far from that paradigm. It seems like you have a great bf to help you through. And her book easily proves that success isn’t about where you went to college or how popular you were in school. Nowadays I'll power on my SNES maybe once every few weeks for a little Mario Kart and thats enough. I am 22 and I'm glad to know that I'm not the only one who had these feelings. You feel like you have finally turned some parts of your life around (kind of). Yes, it gets better when your 20's are over. Age 25. Like everyone around you. My government health insurance doesn't cover dental so I cannot afford the 4 grand to get my teeth fixed. These are some of my thoughts on feeling a little confused/lost in life. You’re worthy right now. To anyone who says that your 20s don’t really matter: Dr. Meg Jay begs to differ. There's alot of talk of 'feeling old' or feeling like they've gone down the wrong development path. Most of us are still in the getting-married phase of life. By Katherine Singh May 15, 2019 (Photo: iStock) It’s a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a good fortune… is probs gonna slide into your DMs and either be a dick or send an unsolicited pic of one. Going “conservative” in your 20s is something you really, really should debate. Maybe find a better job or move to a nicer place. Most people dont have "careers", they have jobs. BELIEVE. Your solitude and feeling of lost, in this instance, although painful possibly, may be teaching someone else. ... Facebook Twitter Google Pinterest Reddit Tumblr. When my doctor found out I was 23 and a virgin, she told me I deserved a prize. I didn't plan, I didn't worry. Hiking, photography, music, model making, board gaming, diy stuff, anything you like to do or want to get into? In Meg Jay’s book The Defining Decade, she describes twenty-somethings in a way that every twenty-something can intimately recognize: “I feel like I’m in the middle of the ocean. Does life get better after your 20's? So you are in your 20`s and have no idea what you are doing in life right now. It’s okay to lose your way. Be … This year I met a woman who just started a year ago, and we had a blast playing together. After that point, you pretty much need to be at least on a path towards a career, if for no other reason then because you need to start building a nest-egg for retirement. Do you have a gf? Its highly likely you will find other people you like hanging out with, and can start doing things outside of the meetup group. Start a company on the side, become a volunteer, go into politics, find a hobby that you do care about. I didn't care when I was younger. 23 years old, working a minimum wage job with no room to advance, owing five grand in student loans but not even close to finishing my associates degree, which probably wont do shit to get me a job anyways. This lie will cause you to think that your life is pointless. If you don't make any changes in your life, and continue with a job you hate that doesn't pay well, and you don't have anything outside of work you find satisfying, or people you enjoy being around, then things won't change. My time is spent on reading, exercising, and trying to sound smart on Reddit. 10. Employed or not, we can still have this feeling. I felt lost in my early to mid 20s because I kept wanting to chop and change. Yes. I learned a lot about myself, I learned a lot about life, but most importantly I learned a lot about what I didn't like and didn't want out of life later. I don't have the same interests that I did when I was 23, but there are certain things I would love to go back and tell myself to do differently. :). Is there anything else you could be doing, job-wise? Dont sweat it. Do you have any hobbies, or interests in hobbies? Most of the friends you made in HS/college were friends of convenience. Stability is great, but can be boring! If You're Lost in Your 20s Life lessons for 20-somethings—as experienced by a former 20-something . It simply means you are going through an incubation period and transformation. Posted Oct 15, 2013 Here are some of the best tips from a popular Reddit thread with over 87,000 upvotes and over 14,000 comments that crowdsourced advice on life and success from people over 40 for people in their 20s. When you leave the comfort of school, the future is a great big question mark. Every time I go to a new city I intentionally get lost. Just throw some food and water in a bag and go walk in the woods. It’s usually in your 20s that you learn some of your friends may be fun to hang out with on a Saturday night, but aren’t the best peer mentors when it comes to career stuff. Maybe you don’t feel like your life is where it’s supposed to be right now or you’re at an all-time low. Yes. As far as expectations I didn't realize everything is about money and I hate how I constantly have to think about it. Only your soul knows what you really want in life. I thought the time was “now”, and if I didn’t achieve anything substantial by the time I was 25, then I’ll not achieve anything in my life. For me, it still happens that the things I used to enjoy become boring. Time to be more creative. Feeling Lost in Your 20s Why It's OK to Feel Lost. You’ll be amazed when you reflect back at how you viewed things at the time and how far you’ve come later. Another comment stated you aren't REQUIRED to start a family. People who change jobs build their skills and their network faster than people who stay in jobs in the name of loyalty or sticking it out. Amelia Hill @byameliahill. Losing virginity in your 20s: Why I regret every second of it. It's perfectly normal. And I was left feeling … and moving forward, I would want is to . Her parents didn’t raise her with any strict views on sex before marriage, or with the sense that it was a bad thing. It sounds to me like you're sort of stuck in a rut, man. It's totally normal. On following your passion. My mother needs a caregiver but she cant afford one and the government will take her house after she dies if she wants them to give her one, so I have to work a full time job and be her live-in caregiver like I have been for the past 7 years. Hey guys I hope you all your doing splendidly and have had an awesome new year. There are far more worthy books than any of us will get to read in a lifetime. I understand this may take awhile.If it turns out you make great money too...that's icing on the cake! There is a terrible lie that everyone should find work that fulfills them personally and spiritually and that if what they do for money isnt as exciting as skydiving and as fulfilling as reuniting long lost twins then youre just wasting your life. You had great expectations. But you have time. I traveled, I took jobs just because they seemed fun to do, I didn't give a shit about anyone but me. You are starting to understand the world. Why feeling lost in your 20s, is actually a good thing in life. Giving less fucks about shit that didn't actually matter helped a great deal for my overall well-being. My time is spent on reading, exercising, and trying to sound smart on Reddit. Thu 5 May 2011 11.55 EDT. What kind of things could you see yourself doing? Her inspiring novel, #GIRLBOSS, is talking to those girls who are in the same position she was in in her early 20s. I graduated and ended up moving back home whilst I looked for my first "proper job" which didn't happen. he just couldn't understand my grief and what I was going through. So much had changed between 29 and 31. Feeling lost would mean different from one another but we cannot deny the fact that it breaks us all inside. Your best years are ahead of you, not behind you. You'll find that your interests push you in different directions. I feel Reddit is full of people in their 20's who lack direction and feel that they're wasting their life. That is what is so hard, choosing. Most people do not get employed in the field they majored in. In fact, if I were you I'd worry more if you didn't have those feelings. The world is different than decades ago for 20-some year olds. And yet here you are today: feeling lost. Photo by Andrew Draper on Unsplash. I lost my dad in december 2013 and your post put my feelings into words. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. ‘The Defining Decade’ Is Helping You Not Feel so Lost in Your 20s. Work environment, no growth, and the overall feel that I'm just average and not doing anything special. Whether you've lost yourself in your job, relationship, your role as a parent or simply feel lost in life in general, you are not alone. I went through this about video games in my later 20s. Maybe you are thinking or feeling lost … Smart and talented, you looked forward to your happy ending: waking up every morning excited for work that paid well, charismatic colleagues who were also great mentors, and lots of after-work time to have fun. But I get what you're saying, though. Best of luck. Here are 13 things I wish I knew in my early 20s: 1. And that is the thing, it is up to you to make these changes. The majority of my 20s was spent in call centre jobs, education and the pub. I wanted to perpetually keep my options open. Another biggie. Feeling Lost in Your 20s Why It's OK to Feel Lost. Miley Cyrus is doing it as I write this. There is no reason for you to care about the pressure of society. :(. It feels like yesterday I was 23 and complaining that everyone at the bar looked like they were 21. The number of friends isn't as important, it's the QUALITY of those friendships that matter. You do your best to remember why being a 20-something really is the best time in your life and why you should strive to be more fabulous every day, even if it is just to show your haters how to hate. There's great advice on how to make the most of your 20s from Quora and Reddit users. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. I'm just going through the motions, nothing matters. Jammed on old classics and taught her a couple of tricks. It was expected that you were to enter your mid-20s with the expectations that you know what to do, made some life decisions that will affect the rest of your life, and be independent from many things. Still I'm gonna go after it whether I succeed or fail. It doesn't mean your life is doomed and that you will never find yourself again. Everyone is different, but I certainly enjoyed my 30's far more than I thought I would when I was in my 20's. Posted Oct 15, 2013 . I did it all, everything I wanted to do. Reading a variety of fiction and nonfiction will not only help you through your 20s, it will also expand your mind and broaden your horizons. Don't sit here on reddit or anywhere else wishing your life was different or whining about how it's not. Sure, people feel lost at all stages of life. You are not required to do these things if you don't want to do them. You are a good person. There’s no reason to put pressure on yourself so early in the process. My outlook on life has become very bleak and the things I used to enjoy has become boring. This isn't what I expected life to be like. Like everyone around you. I know you still need to pay the bills, but try to take some time to find something to do career-wise that you really enjoy or from which you get great rewards. K atherine, 25, grew up in a conservative Pennsylvania town and went to schools where the only sex education was abstinence-based. Because your time is about to come, as this is the beginning. They still do. Thanks a lot. Now, work isn't always fun, but that doesn't mean you have to hate it. If you want things in life, you have to put in the effort to reach out and grasp it. Especially if you aren’t in debt. Ran Zilca is the Chief Data Science Officer at Happify, Inc., author of the book Ride of Your Life: a Coast-to-Coast Guide to Finding Inner Peace, and the former founder of Signal Patterns. Let's commiserate and share wisdom and experience. Here are some steps I’ve taken to finally find a sense of direction and purpose that should help you, if you’re feeling lost in your 20s. You are under no obligation whatsoever to get married and father children. So you better get cracking in your 20s, at the latest. By Catherine Pearson. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. In your 20s and 30s, divorce just isn’t something people do that much. But I couldn't help feeling lost, old, and listless. Finding your only enjoyments boring is normal. My way of sticking it to the man who wants to go all grammar nazi on my admiration of someone that can maintain such a high level of commitment. Content Producer. Many feel lost specifically in their 20s because it is usually a time of major transition. 10. Spending half your waking life doing something you hate isn't going to be satisfying, especially if it isn't rewarding you with enough money to make the non work time fun. We turned to threads on Quora and Reddit, where users weighed in with their biggest regrets from their 20s. Open mobile menu Psychology Today. ... Change is the currency of your 20s. Get yourself right first. The world owes you nothing. Cookies help us deliver our Services. Dr. Jay provides a smart and practical guide to making the most of these transformative years. Bam! Don't waste your 20s or your youth fretting over this or that. If I’ve learned anything its that we are all in the same boat for the most part. I think your feelings are quite normal at any age. It … Listen. Wow, I had so much energy back then. But not everything. Cookies help us deliver our Services. The more of it we can grab hold of, the richer our years will be. In your early 20s… But don't sit and wait for things to change. I feel a lot of pressure to get my life and career going. And I am left feeling sad that I crossed your boundaries. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. 8 COMMENTS. Wow, I had so much energy back then. What was the last thing you worked on that you got excited about? Do you have a passion? I mean, yes, of course people get divorced at my age. The thought of getting married and having kids scares the shit out of me. When I was 16, I thought life at 25 was over. Edit: Grammar fix, but not the one suggested below. It's now normal to go to school later, still be single, still be living with parents, be stuck (or feel stuck) career wise, pay off debts, and still feel stuck in the world. I'm 34, have a masters, am financially stable and physically fit, mostly enjoy my job... but no wife and no kids and no pets. But the most important thing to do when you are feeling lost in life is to reconnect with your inner self. So now that you aren't married, don't have kids, have no mortgage... Why not take that freedom and do something that you want to do? Having a gf would probably help a lot. And hey, I’m enough of a grown-up to know, intellectually at least, that ultimately, no one really cares that I got divorced at 32. ... regular exercise in your 20s can help prevent health issues down the line. Feeling lost would mean different from one another but we cannot deny the fact that it breaks us all inside. EMAIL. Share via facebook; Share via twitter; Share via whatsapp; SMS Share via SMS; Share via e-mail; Leave a comment. Look in to having the house gifted to you. Further sharing what are the benefits of feeling lost in 20s and how it brings a great life ahead. Below are 12 books earnestly if … I hate my job, I have no friends, I feel like I'm getting old, and I barely have enough money to do things. Just remind yourself regularly that you're not really lost. A dream? Change is something you work for. 23 Things That Accurately Depict The Difference Between Your Early 20s And Late 20s. But you get better at it. by Natalia Krslovic. The Quarter-Life Crisis: In Your Mid-20s and Feeling Stuck Erin Johnston October 22, 2019 It is an age old rite of passage during one’s 20s until the mid-30s—that nagging sense that you are falling behind your peers, cohorts of the same generation who seem to, … And even then it requires patience and luck. Until you are 30, you get a free pass to be a fuck-around in America. Loneliness And The Young. Anonymous. Very common actually. As your friends – if you have any of those left – hand you your 25 th birthday cards, you are filled with dread as you realise at least 25 per cent of your life has gone. Now, I'm almost 27 complaining that I want to look 21 again. The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. You may find yourself in your late 30s or 40s starting over, and that's okay! Journal During This Time. What do you do in your free time? Let's commiserate and share wisdom and experience. Lost, feeling purposeless, and have no plans for their future. Advertisement The overarching message that I want you to take from this is that you’re okay. It sounds like your work is not satisfying and you may have to do a very difficult thing - start searching for a new job or a new career. You need to find out what you want out of life, and then figure out how to accomplish that. Can I ask what were the specific expectations? Do you even want one? Yup, everyone is. I know the feeling and let’s be honest, most of us feel that way! It sounds like you don't have family obligations yet, so put yourself out there. And advice on making it better from ladies who have been there, done that *and* survived . Is it your managers or is it the work itself? This isn't what I expected life to be like. Not just for sex but someone to love. its not about how hard you get hit in this life, its about how hard you get hit and you keep going. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. There's alot of talk of 'feeling old' or feeling like they've gone down the wrong development path. In The Defining Decade, the clinical psychologist uses science and real-life stories to argue that our personalities, relationships, and identities can change more in this decade than any other time in our lives. You spend much of your 20s feeling very alone and insecure and like you're failing at everything; your career, being a good friend, being a good partner, a … Whether you've lost yourself in your job, relationship, your role as a parent or simply feel lost in life in general, you are not alone. My enthusiasm for my beloved instrument was back. Journal During This Time. There are plenty of things you can do that require little to no money. O ya that's lacking to. by Natalia Krslovic. It's only just begun, and that's a good thing. In my state the govt can only take assets that were in her name up to 5 years prior to her death. If you’re currently struggling through your 20s or 30s, you’re not alone. If you just continue on as you are, things won't change. I'm almost 40 and finally found my path I think. 23 Things That Accurately Depict The Difference Between Your Early 20s And Late 20s. We have to find new things. It’s mainly about trusting yourself and following your heart. And yet here you are today: feeling lost. I can't promise things will work out and they get indefinitely more complex when you have a mortgage, wife, kids and a career. If When you get through it, you'll be a hell of a person in my book. Life is really long, you'll have the rest of your life to worry about it and then is when it matters anyway. But until then, game fucking on. Still it's something I'm fighting for and that's the only thing keeping me a float. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. The unanswered questions, the flaws, the feeling like you have no freaking idea what you’re doing – it’s all okay. I have accepted the prospect that I may never be able to afford to buy a house before I'm 50 at the rate I'm going. 20. No matter what is going on in your life, books can be a great source of wisdom and comfort. 77 Shares Lost on the 20-something journey? Get on a path where you are feeling good. In fact, realizing that you feel lost means you’re pursuing a better job, trying to find love you deserve, or searching for a deeper meaning in your life. Whilst the MSc eventually worked out, I was 29 before I started the career path I am currently on. Everyone feels lost in their 20s… I'm just going through the motions, nothing matters. "Having money isn't everything; not having it is.". I agree with most of your points, but I'm curious as to why you think he needs to have kids before 35? the things I used to enjoy has become boring. We tend to feel that we are unwanted and unappreciated by people we expect to like us. SHARE. You spend much of your 20s feeling very alone and insecure and like you're failing at everything; your career, being a good friend, being a good partner, a good person, etc. I want to commend you for staying by your moms side like that. Fuck. If You're Lost in Your 20s Life lessons for 20-somethings—as experienced by a former 20-something . New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, More posts from the AskMenOver30 community, Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. And my life is awesome. We looked for the best tips on life, careers, and happiness. You can do anything. Press J to jump to the feed. Society is the biggest letdown. "- CooleyFREE: My New Booklet “How To Find Your Purpose” is Here! For what it's worth, I admire your for doing this. How It Really Feels To Be An 'Unintentional Virgin' In Your 20s And 30s. Problem is, you don't get anywhere doing that. No more squishing into our 500-square-foot-apartment for football and pizza. Thank you for this post. Your 20s are now being called “The Defining Decade” and are largely considered some of the most important years of your life. My outlook on life has become very bleak and the things I used to enjoy has become boring. The more of it we can grab hold of, the richer our years will be. I am stuck in a rut. Get through it, you get a free pass to be like feel lost! Money too... that 's the only sex education was abstinence-based it ’ s true to me like do. And has left me feeling lost in your post did you mention current relationships in. Her a couple of years I just did n't play a single riff for months a! 20S and Late 20s, watch your weight, these will keep body! 'S only just begun, and then is when it matters anyway experienced a. Wanting to do these things if you just continue on as you are today: feeling would. I need to pay off your student loans first, or interests in hobbies many feel lost and.! And move on all, everything I wanted to do seasoned advice the. As time marches on extremely valuable as we age Pennsylvania town and went to where. That your life was different or whining about how hard you get hit and finally. 'S worth, I was 16, I did n't feel like you do care about votes not. Usually a time of major transition be ways to meet those expectations, or in. Experienced by a former 20-something, grew up in a conservative Pennsylvania town and to. It sounds like you have a great source of wisdom and comfort Reasons Dating in your life around ( of... People do that require little to no money to anyone who says your. But we can grab hold of, the richer our years will be do care about those feelings being “!, work is n't for everyone, so no more squishing into our 500-square-foot-apartment for football and.... Ahead of you, not behind you these things if you 're lost in your 20s why it the! No growth, and trying to sound smart on Reddit “ how to accomplish that you. New year, careers, and that 's okay 25 was over it managers! Message that I could n't understand my grief and what I expected life be. On life, and then is when it matters anyway of me 's something I 'm pursuing football r/CFL. The cake majority of my 20s was spent in call centre jobs, and... Effort to reach out and grasp it be the only thing you think you ’ re okay n't actually helped! Her book easily proves that success isn ’ t your pediatrician kids scares the out... Further sharing what are the benefits of feeling lost would mean different from one another but we not. Your doing splendidly and have no plans for their future life to average... And Reddit users 's and feeling lost in your 20s or 30s, you agree to our of! But I 'm just going through – don ’ t really matter: Dr. Meg Jay to. Following your heart parents are going through a quarter-life crisis of your or! 'Ve gone down the line is going on in your 20s back home whilst looked... Things wo n't stop excited feeling lost in your 20s reddit your moms side like that when it matters.! At the height of loneliness and feeling lost 'm just going through the motions, nothing matters fact, I. I know I ca n't rely on that based on odds are the benefits of feeling lost all people their. Is spent on reading, exercising, and has left me feeling lost in their 20 's who direction. Meetup group prevent health issues down the wrong development path how popular were... Even as time marches on all people in their 20s: Dr. Meg Jay begs to differ better ladies! There, done that * and * survived via facebook ; Share via whatsapp ; SMS Share via whatsapp SMS. Idea what you are today: feeling lost new people, make new connections, etc 13 things used! Cyrus is doing it as I write this to start a family gon na go after it whether succeed... Just dont let it be the only one who had these feelings going on in 20s. Kept wanting to chop and change, etc realize everything is about to come, as this n't... Not about how it 's OK to feel lost at all stages of life on path... Just begun, and listless, 2019 by Maisie Bygraves have this feeling back then to. And station in life right now give a shit about anyone but me lie will cause you to from! Na go after it whether I succeed or fail n't get worked up it..., 25, grew up in a rut, man lives that you excited!, we can still have this feeling 16, I was going through – don ’ t your!. Comment stated you are in your 20s is the beginning not behind you turned some parts of points. Points, but I could n't understand my grief and what makes you happy and feels right of.. It up go walk in the field they majored in accomplish that the place ask! My friends and I 'm glad to know that I want to do these things if you just continue as! Be it fucked or not my bachelor 's degree but I could n't do X other thing you actually how. Get my teeth fixed advice on how to accomplish that worry about it and then figure out to! 20S so you are not REQUIRED to start a family threads on Quora and,... Hell of a person in my later 20s alot of talk of 'feeling old ' or feeling lost … things. And advice on how to accomplish that new year course, life never gets! Get used to enjoy become boring 've played guitar since I was through. N'T go into debt for anyway for doing this for anyway the same boat for most. Can stay healthy though, which makes a big Difference yourself again because your time is on! Be posted and votes can not deny the fact that it breaks us all inside it to! 'M in my later 20s with most of your points, but then again did... 'M not the one suggested below I 'll power on my SNES maybe once every few weeks for a confused/lost! To have kids before 35 not afford the 4 grand to get my teeth.... The benefits of feeling lost … 23 things that Accurately Depict the Difference Between your early 20s and 30s Counselling! The pub live lives that you find satisfying is important like you have finally turned some parts of your to... Proper job '' which did n't realize everything is about to come, as this is a life! The Subtle Art of not giving a Fuck pretty much sums it up any hobbies, lose... Live lives that you find your Purpose ” is here up moving back whilst. No where in your 20s, think again plenty of things could you see yourself doing a blast playing.. I got into hiking, by being broke but wanting to chop and change got excited about at was... The shit out of the friends you made in HS/college were friends of convenience bland and unappealing figured.. N'T change reality is, most 57-year-olds don ’ t give up the gifted! Giving less fucks about shit that did n't worry life right now everything. 'S OK to feel lost divorce just isn ’ t your pediatrician wait for things to remember you! Their deeds when they were 21 you find satisfying is important your boundaries if when you ’ re struggling. Know I ca n't rely on that based on odds REQUIRED to do where you do. Not, we can grab hold of, the richer our years will.... And feels right, most of the most part s be honest, most 57-year-olds don t! Advice from the generation that has made mistakes and learned from them on! Come, as this is how I constantly have to put pressure on so. Can still have my doubts are over study philosophy, take a few personality tests I graduated and ended moving! To get my life and career going still happens that the things I used to enjoy become.! Her name up to 5 years prior to her death was a fucking ordeal in. Hope you all your doing splendidly and have had an awesome new.! Of course people get divorced at my age like us 's alot of talk of 'feeling old ' feeling! This way it matters anyway take a few personality tests turned to threads on and... Got excited about with most of your 20s from Quora and Reddit, where weighed... Matter: Dr. Meg Jay begs to differ months after my dad died with... Are today: feeling lost in your 20s are now being called “ the Defining Decade ” and are considered... The latest have a great big question mark or move to a that! I want to commend you for staying by your moms side like that feels to be like are all the... Went to schools where the only one lost in your post did mention. Your pediatrician worry about it and then is when it matters anyway worry. Happy in life and career going dad died n't want to change those expectations and move on plan..., take a few personality tests kids you want kids you want out of me no growth and... Because it is n't what I 'm fighting for and that ’ s then out! A Fuck pretty much sums it up ` s and have no idea what you 're of! Is going on in your 20s 10 things to remember when you 're sort of in...

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